love letter

dear amorphous, nameless creature
infesting my eyes and throat,
thank you.
without you would be no
writer, husband, home, my mind
stuck on my mother, and my mother’s
mother. there is some freedom in your trap,
some camaraderie gained
through sharing the pain of the same
demon. friends found & lost in your crushing
embrace. suffering has changed its name to ours.
perhaps your pain has brought me to appreciate the joy I have left. perhaps
your horns will dig into my side no longer &
“how are you” will no more terrorize my nightmare.
until then I will support the weight of your antlers
with the branches of a million trees.
for the blossoms will come.
& I will not wither.

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